Online counselling

Arguing with our partners is inevitable but how we argue often makes a huge difference to the happiness of our relationships. Couples counselling offers a new perspective to the same old patterns of conflict and can lead to a shift in communication. Once old patterns are explored and understood we can allow a new way of being together which brings greater connection and intimacy.

At home you may be struggling to get yourself heard during arguments or you may become so overwhelmed that you are unable to say how you are feeling. During our sessions you will have permission to set your own pace and talk freely without fear of interruption.

During sessions I will observe and witness your patterns of interaction and together we will notice what works and what doesn’t. We will explore and try out alternative behaviours until you are both able to relate to and accept each other authentically.

We learn to be who we are in our families.

Importantly, we learn what is expected from us and what we can expect from others. We then take this belief into all of our relationships. If we learned that what we are is good enough we will have healthy realistic expectations of ourselves and others and we will seek out and find loving partners who also have the same sense of being enough.

If, however we learned that somehow no matter what we did, it was never enough, or if we learned that when we made mistakes it is because we were bad in some way then we can become troubled by unrealistic expectations of others and ourselves. This can lead to problems such as perfectionism and we are likely to seek out and find partners who will inevitably let us down. We also then go through life never feeling good enough in our friendships, marriages and careers.

Families are complicated and you might want to explore these issues but feel unable to ask other family members to join you. Maybe you are estranged from some family members or maybe they have passed away but your relationship with them is still causing you to suffer. The good news is that you can do this work on your own. The healing comes from the shift in how you will experience yourself in relation to them and not necessarily from them changing their behaviour towards you.

We will work together to recognise and accept the legacy of your childhood.  We will look at the ways you learned to adapt as a child and the ways that those adaptations followed you into your adult relationships.

Young people are in the prime of their lives but too often are feeling stuck, uncertain and unable to make decisions listening to that voice telling them that they are not good enough.

I see many young people who are struggling today with dating issues, anxiety, career dissatisfaction and the stuff that is keeping them from living life at their best.

A common worry is the pressure they are feeling about where they thought they would be in life by now.

If this describes how you are feeling then perhaps you are ready to explore the possibility of a new way of being.

I can help you with this by meeting you where you are right now and providing you with a space where you can relax into being your good enough self.

We all know how hard it can be negotiating with a 5 year old or trying to get our teenagers to tidy their rooms. I work with many parents who are either co-parenting or single whose main struggle seems to be the quality of the relationship with their kids. I often hear my clients share their horror of discovering that they themselves are behaving in the same way that their own parents did having sworn that they would never do that. I can explore with you the way you were parented and help you leave behind the bits you didn’t like and improve the bits that made you feel good.

The end of an intimate relationship is heart breaking at any age and whatever stage you are at, I will help you understand why it ended and how you can begin to take responsibility for your part in the relationship so that you can have the relationship you want in the future.

This can be very difficult and I work in a way that allows you to develop your self awareness at a pace that is tolerable for you.

It is never too late to improve your relationships and you can begin this work at any age.